I’m humming a song each day now….Have you heard it?
Just say Yes, by Snow Patrol….only my version of the lyrics thought surely written from a boy to his girl…I’m singing the lyrics to me….As if to say yes to my heart…..
Coupla days ago I wrote this note on my facebook profile page.
Seems the deeper I dig, the more often I’m seeing all the ways I’ve said no to my heart.
And not outa finality.
But no. For now.
Because you name it:
Maybe I haven’t felt brave enough.
Maybe I haven’t felt skilled enough.
Maybe. Yes. I haven’t felt “allowed.”
And I’m also not staying in the land of superficial talking about allowed ‘to do’ something.
I’m talking owning permission to be full on the Tre I’m yearning to.
Just say yes.
It’s a wonderful goal.
But an every second test.
It’s like honing in has to happen every single second.
Which I totally get and strive to do…live true to me thought by thought, why the name of this blog.
I will say?
I dont speak openly enough bout the struggle.
I wanna show up more real and be honest like that.
Not to dwell in dramaville.
But rather how to show evidence of the striving.
And to show what I try to do when the striving is opposed and fought against.
And to show how I keep on rallying.
To gain stage time or ear time from you?
I think too much would thrust us into doing at the expense of being true to our innermost inklings.
And maybe this is one way I can advocate for focusing on the who and how we are being.
For what it’s worth it’s where my thoughts are.
Just say yes.