3 Simple Questions that Help Us Nurture Ourselves

Okay, so it’s not always easy. The goal’s there: need to love myself…need to be compassionate with myself.

But there’s that intention…and there’s the moments we’re in right now…

And how can we nurture ourselves when…

–someone’s yelling at us

–we feel unsure about a lot of things

–we take a step forward and feel we’re progressing (on any level) and then something happens and we turn back to prior behaviors and feel like we’re not progressing a wink.

Lemme not talk so vaguely. Lemme just call it:

Nurturing ourselves is ALL about what we decide right in that moment.

It’s a moment of reckoning of choosing of being so conscious that at every moment we DO have a choice….that we start becoming guards of our thoughts more and more and more.

It’s not okay to allow someone the mental or physical space to yell at us.

It’s NOT okay to allow ourselves an ounce more of listening to condemning voices that constantly ridicule or scold.

It’s NOT okay to tolerate being used for another moment in relationships or situations that manipulate us,  try to control us, try lean and keep leaning on us.

No. No. No.

Nurturing our hearts and our thoughts is ALL about getting so clear on what supports and what doesn’t support.

It’s about sensing and asking  what’s holding our hearts or squashing them.

It’s about sensing what choices will feel like a hug and hold our hand while we walk forward vs. which choices will cause us to be constantly ridiculed, scorned, or taken for granted.

Seein’ something?

Seein’ that nurturing ourselves has everything to do with what we allow–and don’t allow–ourselves to choose? to tolerate? to let go?

Nothing just simply happens.

We don’t wake up one morning surrounded by a circumstance that we’re helplessly trapped in. Somewhere down the road we made choices that find ourselves right where we are. And it’s okay. But we’re not trapped–ever. And no matter how stuck we may feel, there are always choices, be them ever so eensy teensy small that will liberate us and allow us the freedom to be and express and live who we are.

Moment by moment, I ask a few simple questions to help me discern whether a certain choice will support and nurture my heart.

1. Does this feel okay?

2. Will this keep me safe? (and by safe I’m very much meaning in my thoughts–the only real place one can ever feel safe).

3. Will this enable me to remain authentic to my life’s intentions…without causing harm to anyone?

All of these questions form a gauge that defines how to nurture me, my heart, my thoughts, my right now.

No one else will ask these questions.

I must. And more: I want to.

How bout you? What do you do to nurture yourself in the right now moment?