If you would prefer to ‘listen’ to an audio version of this story, click this highlighted title: “What would allow me to flow?“
“I hear something,” she thought. “Wind perhaps? Nah, there’s more consistency to it.”
She giggled.
“Consistency is a rather biggie word for me.”
She moved closer to where she assumed the sound was coming….
“Yes….It’s not wind,” she thought. “It sounds more like water.”
And she approached this ‘it’ closer still.
Upon the clearing of the brush, gazing out just a bit farther…
“Yes,” she confirmed.
“A river.”
And she drew closer still….knelt by the edge…and stared at the flowing liquid.
Here a rush.
There a trickle.
There a whirlpool.
Here a flow.
And she gazed deeply where she saw the flow, moved was she by the undisturbed glide.
“I wonder if I could do that?”
She giggled.
“You big silly!” she told herself. “You can’t be water.”
“You are a girl…well, really a woman.”
And then her wise self nudged her from a deeper place within.
As if to remind her to pause…and not refute a possibility.
And in that pause, she heard a deeper voice within.
“You can flow. You must let fear go.”
It’s tone was calm, knowing, certain…surely louder than the trickle or rush or flow of the water.
And it was so clearly heard, she paused and sat even more still, as if to be sure she really heard it.
But come again it did not.
Yet the echo within remained.
“You can flow. You must let fear go.”
“I like that” she thought.
But all of a sudden, her throat tightened and her palms felt sweaty and she heard a whining within.
“But….but…I dunno how? There’s much that I’m afraid of. It would take forever to let it all go.”
She sighed. And her thoughts felt heavy. And tears welled up in her eyes.
She hugged her knees tighter to her chest and rocked, the wind blowing gentler now…kissing her forehead.
And just as she was wont to do when a part of her began squirming withing, she poured her whole being into mommying herself in that right now moment.
And this wise calm sense hugged her heart and reminded her.
“Sweetness luvbug, we have only this now moment. And we can trust Love more than we cave to fear.
You are meant to flow.”
And this time she breathed a deep calming breath.
As the mommy within continued…
“Suppose in those moments of angst or worry you remember this voice…the one that reminds you to let fear go.
It prolly wouldn’t say that if it wasn’t certain that’s the way to flow.”
Hmmm.
She liked that.
Almost like a gentle reminder there’d be something else to hold onto in the place of fear.
and that this something else may well be that Mothering Love.
And then, in just a moment, all that was left was the sound of the flow….
But what she was hearing was that gentle reminder:
“In order to flow you must let fear go…”
“In order to flow, you must let fear go…“