On mornings…and getting another chance

I’ve always loved mornings.

From the first moment I feel conscious to the actual getting up outa bed, my heart feels full.

It’s like this gift from the universe that comes  beckoning “Hey lovey one…here’s your today… You get another chance!”

What do I mean another chance?

For me, I mean:

~ another series of moments to strive to live the purest sense of Tre I know thus far….

~ another set of moments to bring my deepest sense of honesty to my work endeavors…

~ another set of moments to devote myself fully as ever I am able to loving unconditionally and unselved those who are closest to me and those I may never meet.

In short what I mean by another chance is simply: another chance to be….to love….and to do so completely.

Now to be sure, I can recall thousands of mornings I began with the best of intentions…only for afternoons and evenings to waiver and wallow.

~ Maybe I battled in the afternoon or evening with self condemning thoughts.

~ Maybe I wrestled through the sting of an uncomfortable conversation with another.

~ Maybe I lost a moment when out and about in my day where I hurried past a stranger instead of looking up and smiling and taking that one precious moment to exchange our humanity.

I have so so so many goals and probably one of my biggest weaknesses is not always knowing how to chart a doable pathway to achieving those goals.

But an ongoing goal that has no map is simply this: to love…fully…completely…wholly…..And I don’t mean in a romantic way per se…I mean to see another’s wholeness inspite of their misgivings, weaknesses, and obvious offputting tendencies.

But deeper still?  TO SEE MY COMPLETENESS….my WHOLENESS…my right now completeness as a woman.

It’s a bit of seesawing that happens in this endeavor actually because going about my day I may start off feeling and seeing my wholeness and cherishing my completeness as woman but give it an hour or two, and wham bam I may get super caught up in feeling lacking….

of insight

of strategy

of experience

of worldliness

and so on.

And so I then get caught up in dumping on myself and feeling inadequate….when all that time ….I could be taking moments to devote to the very things I feel weak on.

Consenting to inadequacy, weakness, lack on any level is the very source of perpetuating emptiness and is the very thing each one of us should wrestle down and hush in thought.

So that’s what I mean about being grateful about getting another chance.

And here’s more awesome: we don’t just get another chance in mornings.

We get another chance every moment.

Seriously.

Every single moment we defend our wholeness, the very next moment is a moment to fulfil it.

And by wholeness, I’m not talking ego centric….I’m talking spirituality…that right now this moment, each one of us expresses a whole concept a whole view…that our individuality is intact and that we have what we need in thought whether a knowing or a knowing how to attain more knowing.

If I am whole, and complete, and with knowledge and capability now, then okay, I can’t lie and tell you I”m staring at a spankin’ new blueprint of how to achieve what I want to achieve…BUT I CAN TELL YOU I’m resolving to create one….and I’m staring within at all the right now awareness that I have the knowledge to figure out and draft one such plan.

And likewise, knowing I am able, then while I can’t show you a list of ‘what makes me happy’ or ‘what does Tre need to feel like she’s living a right life” I can tell you I have RESOLVED TO CREATE ONE.

And thirdly, while I can’t show you a blueprint for how to do relationships well and right such that they endure, I can SHOW YOU MY HEART…that is so willing to TRY AGAIN AND do it ALL BETTER with the next go round — especially with myself. And I can show you a deep willingness to forgive…me… and to create stronger boundaries and discern with more integrity what are my limits and hold to those instead of letting them go.

In short a deep yearning to be truer to myself…and hold to her needs and protect her desires and take care of her more readily and fully.

And so on.

Do you hear the themes?

a. willingness

b. yearnings

c. desires

d. resolve

Okay…..so to wrap it all up….today? July 16th?

It’s the birthday of a writer whose ideas I live by and who’s teaching has shaped the core of the healing practice I fulfil each day.

Today is Mary Baker Eddy’s birthday….and in celebrating this momentous thinker’s legacy, I am once again on my knees resolving to try again….deeply and earnestly grateful to have another chance….and truly holding to heart a favorite sentence of hers from her Science and Health

“Desire is prayer and no loss can occur from trusting God with our desires, that they may be molded and exalted before they take form in words and deeds.”

So here’s to getting another chance…to be more fully ourselves..wholly, purely, honestly, tenderly, lovingly.

Would love to know how you give yourself another chance.

What works for you?

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If any of these ideas resonate with you and you wanna talk more, feel free to leave a comment below or send an email to tre (at) thought by thought (dot) net

Thanks for taking moments to read and reflect with me. Big hugs.