They got him…the Red Sox won…now what? (Part 1 of 3)

We stayed glued to the tweets and the scanner to witness the manhunt triumph.

We celebrated with the Red Sox victory and Neil Diamond’s solo of Sweet Caroline.

After a tumultuous week of shock, horror, mourning, panic, anxiety, then celebration, in these next moments of calm, inevitable lull… we may be asking: what now?

 

We hear many chanting let’s move on.

We think we need to appear we are doing just that.

We may thrust ourselves into keeping a semblance of normal for those depending on us.

But our hearts have been wripped out and stomped on.

And it’s beyond okay to wanna not just mentally forge ahead.

There’s zero weakness of character or manhood if we deal directly with our thoughts.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting, yet maybe not knowing how to deal with:

• the lingering fragile that grows our vulnerability.
• the present ache for the victims, and the unanswerables of why did this happen to them and wondering what else we could have done to help another avoid tragedy.
• the pull to fear the threat of terrorism.

I’m nodding with you.

My thoughts have been all over these questions and then some.

And like you I’m more than ready to move on…from the sorrow, the gripping fear, the stress over safety, and just the overall feeling fragile.

Yet, I’ve experienced enough shock in my life to know that while the intention of moving on is a beautiful goal, the reality is thought needs total tender nurturing care to do so. Thought needs a mental rock, a place in thought to stand on that is unshakeable, grounding, permanent.

So I wanna directly address how I’m advocating for that place of groundedness. I wanna offer how I’m resolving to strengthen that which I hold to in thought. In a word, how I’m praying — how I’m thinking through all of those questions from a spiritual perspective.

Why?

Because it’s what I’ve found time and again that gives me solid footing so that mentally and thus practically I can move on.

But it’s not a quick fix. It takes tuning into thought and exercising mental discipline.

So I’m gonna show you how I’m thinking through and healing

• the pulls to feel shocked
• the pulls to grieve and mourn for the victims and city 
• the pulls toward anxiety over a heightened terrorism threat

Over the next two days I’ll offer how I’m thinking through and healing these pulls.

I’ll take one ‘mental pull’  per post.

If at any point you wanna discuss the what I’m sharing, I so hope you will.

Use the contact form (click the blue tab on the right side of this screen).

Likewise, if at any point there’s another question lingering for you, I welcome you post it in the comments.

And, one last bit: this is me offering what helps me heal.

It is not an attempt to tell you how to think or what to think or what you should be thinking.

These ideas are what are helping me heal…and i’m offering it from that perspective.

So, rolling up mental sleeves with you, here’s how I’m thinking through and healing the pull to feel shocked :

Okay so the shock that something of this magnitude happened.

That shock is tough. And it wants to linger.

So I’m asking: Tre…what do you believe is the norm. What is the norm, the always going on.

As devastating as it was, that event was not the only thing that was happening in those moments.

My deep conviction is that Mind that creates and sustains and governs all, spiritually, is what is always going on.

And there’s probably more evidence of good happening around the world than horrific terror.

But even if we know this, we have some work to do.

We have to choose if we are going to allow our thought to accept that this kind of possibility could become a norm.

That’s a vital decision, pivotal really, for each one of us to make.

And I for one do not want to sell out mentally or actually to the idea that terror of any kind can become our norm.

I believe in a universal law of harmony that is governing always in all ways everywhere.

And though the evidence of that law is not always easily comprehensible, especially in times of tragedy, I’m choosing and insisting that law is law and it is at work.

So knowing this law is there, I am making a conscious choice to heal the shock by insisting in fact that good is going on.

This is helping me advocate for all mankind…that each one’s inherent inclination is toward that which is good in thought.

So whether we’re about to tweet or about to take a walk, what is compelling each one of our thinking is a law of good.

And I’m defending that this law of good is more comprehensible, more tangible, and more ‘hearable’ than the pull to harm ourselves or someone else.

It’s in thought where all motive occurs.

And when we start with our own thinking and sift thoughts and see what is influencing every single choice, we can weigh:

• is good motivating me?
• is this my highest sense of Love?
• is this the kindest thing to do say act or express?

As I focus there, it’s pulling thought off of the lurking belief that something horrible is going to happen somewhere and it’s forcing me to directly address and manage where I can in the domain I’m able to tweak: my thinking.

And that’s the thing: I’m asking how attentive am I to the good that is happening all around me? How am I noticing a kind word spoken, a smile, a glimpse of humanity.

And I’m asking how can I out-pour and exude more of the good that is possible at any moment, anywhere.

In the immediate days following, I thought about something that happened to me which caused me great frustration. This individual and I had a disagreement and though I tried to speak with her, her final words were over email.

Though we haven’t been in touch for a while, I took some moments to reach out to her and try to reconnect.

While I’m not sure where that will go, I am sure it helped heal the aftermath, or remnant of the awkward in my heart toward her.

So in sum, when pulled to feel shock over that this happened, try to steer thought to focus on:

1. defining your base: decide what you believe in is governing your choices, steering your thought, basing your being.

2. intend to live from that base.

3. see the good that is going on in your life today, now, this moment.

4. witness the good going on around you in others’ lives, today, now, this moment.

5. do something for someone else to celebrate this very moment now of our lives. (Diana has been swimming for the past 24 hours !! and Mayor Menino set up the One Fund for Boston  ).

We don’t have to stay paralyzed in shock that this happened.

We don’t have to approach these next days frail or fragile.

We can continue to walk moment by moment anticipating , defending and exuding the fact that good is going on. Good is happening.