The moment you wake
There’s a familiar ache
The what work or to whom you devoted
All gone in what seems a single moment
You said no
You backed down
The process so wrong
You couldn’t wrap your heart around
Or he said no and left you then
And what would be someday
Turns into what never happened
Or they said
“Stay… But only if you perform
We welcome you with our love
If you follow the program.”
Or a system said
“You’re in…here are the rules”
Cept when you followed them,
it always led to chaos.
The silent empty
Has become a friend
Because I’ve met her time and again
She is very quiet
She seems dark at first
She always shows up and friends me when I’ve walked away from following –perhaps what would have turned worse–
What’s expected
What’s popular
What “most people do”
What would have been good for all
Or what causes them to say “We like you”
And followed my heart
But after the shock of the absence of familiars is gone
After however long —
months …even years —
of getting used to now’s song
I find the silent empty isn’t empty or silent at all…
But a friend I must hold to
–and not run from–
if I’m going to ever face thought…
I mean this with the depth of my being of love and honesty:
If we don’t friend the silent empty?
We’ll go from filler to filler…
And it’s ok
You can do it…
And many do to be sure…
And always eventually there’s that knock on thought ‘s door
Saying “stop running. Stand still. You are not alone and be alone you never will.”
Most don’t know what to do when the silent empty shows up at their thought door
Because she seems dark
She seems shy
She seems often faceless
And has no plan
She stands there
Watching
Waiting
As if you’ll choose to care
And she always feels like if we choose her we are getting off that life train of ego’s I am.
When I’ve seen her of late
(And she comes often)
My heart wells up…
As if an angel reminder
“I am here for you to experience
Letting go filler doesn’t mean you’re giving up”
And when I’ve seen her lately
its another moment of
“Ohhh okay
You need me to halt those fight the good fight doings
And walk that other way….”
And this is hard
And it’s often intimidating
To halt the doings in the guise of the good fight and do the real thought work of healing…
But when I face –the silent empty –thought
It’s where I choose to lean on Love
And leaning on Love is anything but empty…or silent…
It defaults to no system
It’s embrace is full and plenty
Hardly a moment that the silent Empty is ever silent
It voices completeness and with it so much love
If you wish to know what’s waiting for you
Here friend reading is what I’ve found the silent empty is voicing to me and you:
Hello
Love is all
And in the now
I’ve created and caused all
All good
All love
All that is ever pure
All life
Unerring
All that is substance and will endure
You are not alone
You are not aimless
You are not unloved
You are refer ally good and infinite
I am here
I fill this moment up
There is no empty in my Allness to be sure
You are forever reflected by me and because of this only Love endures
—–
What these truths have come to mean to mes:
I am never alone
Without certainty
I’m never vague
I’m never un thought
I’m never directionless
I am one with God
No one is ever ever alone
Each and all are able to feel Love
Not from someone but from everpresence
Love is God and man is Her image.
“God is Love. More than this we cannot ask, higher we cannot look, …farther we cannot go.”
~ Mary Baker Eddy